I didn’t get help or diagnosed until my early 30’s. I’ve lived with severe depression and suicidal ideation since I was quite young, something that started in an abusive home and bullying at school.
Loved this book, I read it in the wee hours of the morning relating to everything Matt has gone through and cheering for his moments of coming out of the darkness that is so devastating. It made me laugh in places too, it's gutsy and so freaking RIGHT. I have done that, hundreds of times, with my cat by my side, wishing normal was in my scope. Matt mentions staring out of a window and watching people go by and thinking he just wants to be normal like them. Most don’t truly want to end their lives but desperately want to stop the awful pain and loss of hope.Ī bit that resonated with me was about how withdrawn you become from the world, scared to go out on your own, or even with others, you need people but you can't cope with them.
Did you know the most written words on suicide notes are “you’ll be better off without me” because those fighting mental illness feel they are a burden on others, you feel ashamed and less than. Often surprising to many people these thoughts come calmly and logically. When those thoughts hit and you start thinking how you should do it, where, will it work, what if I stuff up then I’m more damaged?
He tackles the issues of suicidal thoughts and tendencies and how scary it can be, nobody wants to talk about that right? But we need to. He breaks it down into simple formats, like lists of what you feel like on a bad day or what you are thinking and it's all stuff that NONE of the other books cover, it's really genuinely what is going on in your dark mind. Matt so simply explains how it feels, he is so darn honest and all of what he says is true (trust me I know). Never more timely to get yourself this book. I first read this and reviewed back in 2015 and I decided to read it again this year (2021) as my depression has escalated as has my anxiety during the fear of COVID and isolating lockdowns. This book should be given or bought by EVERYONE battling depression, or has a loved one battling it. No psychobabble here (from Psychologists who have never experienced depression) - just real raw telling of Matt Haig's journey with the dreaded black dog. FINALLY! A real book about depression that makes sense, that those with depression will read and sit nodding their heads and agreeing all the way through it.
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